Bizarre-O Singing Guy POSES A DILEMMA...

...but, here's the thing, readers. In exchange for my valuable advice about where to find weirdos on the street, today I am asking for something in return. As I was considering how to describe Bizarre-O Singing Guy's location, I considered mentioning The Art Students League, which is right across the street from Lee's and Singing Guy. I've checked it out before and it's a very enticing place - low cost art education that doesn't give you a degree, but teaches you what you want to know, offers cheap figure-drawing and -painting classes as well as full programs of study and certification, and generally is a great fixture of the community.

This got me thinking about whether I should invest in taking some classes there. I'd really like to, even if it's just one class a week, to keep myself working artistically. Deadlines work for me better than musings like, "I should really draw the characters from 'A Wocket In My Pocket' and put them all over the apartment in the appropriate places... someday..."

But THIS got me thinking about how I have virtually no time to even finish my musings, much less put them into action, and how the number of projects I'm working on now should kind of preclude me from starting new ones on a whim. Which led me to thinking about how I really need to learn how to prioritize a litte and focus more on the things that need finishing, so I can get to the things that need starting. Which led me to the realization that in general, in life, I have a serious problem with commitment to ANYTHING. I have a desire to dedicate myself with toal abandon to every one of my friends, every hair-brained scheme, every project and every piece of art that I have, which sounds great, but only works in my head. In reality, I never have enough time or energy for everything, which leads me to having not enough time and energy for ANY thing.

Which led me to realize that this whole 'writing a book' thing is stressing me out enormously, mostly because I can't seem to pin down the appropriate time in my schedule for leg work like researching, writing, and organizing. I want it to happen, and I can't really expect it to if I continue on the general fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants course I've been on. Which led me to realize that I have to figure out what I'm doing and try to actually commit myself to a plan of action. Ideally, I'll be able to get a lot of work done at the gallery this summer, when all the rich people and gallery directors are out of town and I have less to do than usual (which is saying a LOT, let me tell you). But generally speaking, I can't really accomplish a whole hell of a lot during the workday because I am, even on the best of days, getting interrupted regularly by the telephone and visitors to the gallery. I can write, but I end up repeating myself and being very unfocused and then just having to rewrite later on when I'm not at work. Which is a strategy, but it's not the best.

I really want to try to dedicate myself to this book in the evenings after work, but it can be supremely difficult with the number of other responsibilities I have, including, you know, laundry, dishes, and general hygiene. Not to mention a social calendar, two other part-time writing gigs, a full-time gig, and the billion incidental happenings that come along with living in the city. I haven't had any luck with the efforts I've made so far, beyond a few stops and starts here and there, which are always aborted after a few weeks due to some new scheduling dilemma. But I want this thing to move forward, to research, to write, to get an agent, to sell the thing, to write the thing, to have a BOOK.

I ALSO really want to start taking night classes toward a career that might actually be a career in illustrating/publishing. Mostly I just want to know how to do something besides answering phones and reading books, and to have a piece of paper saying as much, and even have the option of having a job in a field that interests me instead of this piece of crap whittling away my days trying futilely to write the book that will get me out of here - which, in reality, probably will NOT get me out of here but just earn me a few grand, optimistically. There's a publishing certificate program in publishing that has a specialization in illustration at CCNY, which is inexpensive and which I could do on my own time, at night, in a few years. If I don't get the book done, or if I do and it doesn't get me out of here, this certificate could at least help me switch into an actual career if I wanted it to. BUT it would require the sacrificing of even more of my evenings to something besides the book.

So, here's my grand question to you guys:
Should I keep the certificate program on the back burner for now and try to force myself into a commitment to this book, then maybe take classes AFTER the book things is over, either through failure or being published?
Or, should I just sign up for classes, sacrifice the evenings, and hope that the book can continue to grow while I do it? I mean, the added stress on my schedule might actually help me budget the rest of my time so I can work more effectively on the book... MAYBE. Or maybe I'll be so stressed I'll have a total nervous breakdown and finally get the two months of rest in a mental ward I've always wanted... win-win?


I really can't make up my own mind here... Help!